There are no boring things, Only boring people.

8/13/2011

"There are no boring things, Only boring people." - Unknown


For the kids that I work with, the most common reason for engaging in drug use is the inebriation makes the mundane more excitable. Boredom is strange concept to me because to admit that "I am bored" is to admit that I am fully incapable of finding interest or discovery in the miriade of natural and man made creations. The Buddhists believe that all that is necessary to live a life of fulfillment is one square meter and in it you may find all knowledge. While this may hold true is a under very narrow, Buddhist philosophy, I find it much easier to seek discovery in that which is being ignored in the rush of life. 

 

  The day began with a quick trip up to the REI garage sale to "invest in practical gear for work"....  this always results in buying things that I don't really need that would be better classified as toys. I exited the store with the replacement of the $119 dollars burden that could only be relieved by a GoPro Camera.

   First order of business was to document the decrepit industrial section that looms across the train tracks.

          

 Before too long I was wrapped up in the idea of exploring what looked like to be a refinery of some sort that had been unused for sometime. Walking around the premiss relieved numerous points as which the fence was in poor repair but they all lacked the a cinematic assault I desired. Something about crawling under a fence makes me feel like a criminal, but flying up it like Spiderman is another story entirely. 

Kentucky Derby, Glow Party, Furry People in Salt Lake

05/08/2011

 
I arrived in Salt Lake on a Monday and tooled about town waiting for someone from SLC couchsurfing to ring my handy. Eventually Josh invited me over to use the upstairs closet which has a massage table and an excellent view of the capitol building. The building is...stately. The prophet John Smith was a free mason so much of Mormon iconography and early SLC architecture has strong influences from the Masons visual lexicon. The weather closes in and I retreat to Josh's.

The capitol building is set on a high hill over looking downtown Salt Lake and the capitol neighborhood is on its steep western slope. He's a great host and funny, but always seemed to be in a conference call or running outside to grab a quick smoke. We have good conversations and I stayed up late chatting with his awesome roommates.

Feeling a bit energized by my CS luck, I fished for some entertainment and eventually happened upon a Kentucky Derby party. I arrived just in time for the final race at 4:45, put 2 dollars on Midnight Seduction, and cut into a jar of sickly sweet mint julep. There might way to good way to mix burbon, mint, and sugar, but evidently that secret is kept in Kentucky. 5pm: my head hurts, stomach is too knotted to eat a bacon wrapped hotdog, Animal Nature has won the race, and a strange Chinese man is determined on explaining the procedures, traditions, and benefits of drinking 10 cups of green tea a day. 3 cups of tea later my co-worker, Eric, and I are ready to attack the night. 

Pictured above is our host for the evening. Tami's loud, pierced, devilishly funny, and furnishes her home with a member from every subculture in SLC. I get annoyed with some hipster artist types and open the evening to a bit of "still life photography." I'm determined to invent a program that can automatically render any photo for saturated colors and high contrast for that edgy, artistic, aren't-I-so-talented look.

11:30pm   Okay people really need to go home so I can sleep on the couch. I'm contemplating crawling in the back of my truck until this fashion nightmare walks through the door.... GLOW PARTY! WHERE?

 The party is apparently being held by the thirsty congregation of Salt Lake City Atheists. Every table is covered with sticky cocktails glasses and uncorked bottles of Rose' wine. The music has degenerated to a cacophony of flamboyant pop/dance accentuated with the writhing howls of flamboyant atheists decorated in glow jewelery and exposed by pulsating lasers. My stomach is starting to knot again.

I wake early and comb the condiments in the kitchen for something to cull the void in my belly. The only thing left untouched from last night are the sticky, tooth cracking, throat sticking Chinese candies that are meant to be consumed with tea. Lacking tea I chomp a few and immediately curl up in a ball on the couch to assess my decision making process. 

My other co-worker, Sofia, calls and I join her and a friend in the park for coffee and eggs.
 

There are grown men dressed as knights fighting with sticks and others dressed as furry animals. SLC confuses me. 

 

Wilderness Therapy

05.05.2011

 Being a field staff for wilderness therapy poses many challenges to our individual sanity. It strain relationship, friendships, and skews the boundaries and norms associated with day to day life. One morning in Salt Lake, I was awoke to sound of violent squeaking coming from the kitchen. What I found was my friend madly trying to start a fire for morning coffee. 

 Now you might think this is joke... that this is all humor. Normally I would have to agree with you. Staff are typically fine and upstanding so that we serve as good roll models for the youth.  We take pride in helping others cope with all variety of challenges such as poor weather and a consistent diet of red-brown mush flavored with taco seasoning. But even the strongest of minds can crack, even the most fit fail, and then we are left to our own devices.....

 To the right is a perfect example of Aspenosis. It is a crippling illness that causes the skin to excrete a sticky paste during sleep. The result is that the victim is glued to the inside of their sleeping bag. Because we are typically in remote location, the bottom of the sleeping back must be cut open to allow the victim to continue hiking. 


For this reason we employ wise sages to follow us because only their magic is the only know cure for a variety of ailments that afflict desert travelers. Eji is one of the best known of our sages... unfortunately it is hard to divine wisdom from his persistent ramblings as the response to many questions is a high pitched, "No, you're a marshmallow."  
    It is unfortunate that much of Eji's wisdom is lost on the students because their natural tendency to resist medicine and who can blame them. Apenosis is a progressive illness, the wiggy worms pictured above is the first stage. The cure is to marinate a chipmunk for three days in Tobasco and sunscreen and then grill it over a bed of juniper branches. As a program we are not allowed to force the students to take medicine because our goal is to foster cooperation and self improvement. However, a student can be stubborn beyond reason and the result is.... well take a look for yourself. 

 

 Okay okay, things aren't grim all the time. The Spring is an amazing season. The next two photos were taken 48 hours apart.
 

 The above is from a hike to the top of Steel Butte near where we found the 800 year old Freemont bowl. And below, the view of the "Land of the Sleeping Rainbow."

 

Hiking can get a bit boring at times. So we like to spice things up by having the kids push Mormon hand carts. The Mormons didn't invent the hand cart, but they did move to Utah from the east coast using them. 

Hitchhiking

Back in November I traveled up to Santa Barbara to enroll in an online course at the city college, visit with my sister, see some old friends, and recover property from the ex(or what was left of it). Getting onto the freeway to return home I spied this crusty lump on the on-ramp. "Look at this dirty crust ball trying to hitch a ride in Santa Barbara. Does he really think someone is going to pick him up. Oh wait, that's probably what I looked like in Europe." Hitchhiking is one of the best ways to travel. It's an opportunity to give another person the pleasure to feel that they are a good Samaritan and spend a few hours getting to know a total stranger. This fella was just a humble traveler skilled at hopping trains and moving about the country. He was polite, well spoken, and entertaining. 

More recently, I had driven in to Capitol Reef National Park to have dinner with Crystal and the other Rangers. Crystal works in the guest center despite her aversion to customer service and general disinterest in helping tourists find the bathroom. She told me about a clumsy guy that had knocked over a display rack and spoke with a strange accent. He was wearing a fox hat and she guessed he was from Europe. When she left work he was trying hitch a ride to the Grand Canyon "Oh, he must be French. Only a Frenchman could be walking a desert road at night in dumb glee," I said.


We were seated in the back yard sipping Absinthe when along the highway came a bizarre man. His backpack was decorated with all sorts of cardboard signs, stuffed animals, and empty water containers. It took me a bit to cross the river between her house and the road and then run him down, but yes he was French. Aurelien was all smiles, laughs, and apologies so I invited him to abandon his hike and have a refreshing pastis with Crystal and I.

Aurelien had long since surrendered to the anglo tongue and had shortened his name to shortest phonic, "Oreo." Oreo was doing an internship in Calgary because he wanted to experience the famous Canadian winter. He had 23 days free before exams and was taking the opportunity to hitchhike to the Grand Canyon. 

Well as the night wore on I knew that we needed to make this stay memorable for him. With a little coaxing, one of the rangers pulled out the artillery for a little demonstration of crazy Americans with guns. 


In the morning I had, what the French would call, a gaul du bois or " head of wood." A word to the wise, never drink more than one glass of Absinthe. I took Oreo for a hike up Cohab Canyon to see the glorious red cliffs and retreated back to Crystal's to drink water. Oreo was not suffering as poor as I and set himself to baking French cookies to thank Crystal for her generosity. 


While in France, I did a good bit of hitchhiking and train jumping. It was all good experiences... accept for that one time. This older guy in a van was a bit drunk and every time I talked to him he would begin swerving. 


I was always able to get a ride without much difficulty accept the one time I hitched with a girl. No one wanted to give us a ride. 


So the moral to the story, if you see a hitchhiker, why not give them a lift.... heck, it might be me.

When in Rome do as the Romans

So I bought a new bike today. SLC is filled with hipsters riding bikes.... and now I'm one too. Look at this Hipster.

These are the specs on the bike.... not that I know what any of this means.


Componentry includes:
-Shimano 600 Ultegra tri-color hubs, Mavic SUP front/Matrix rear rims
-Sugino MP crank w/ Origin 1 1/8" chainring (NEW)
-16 tooth 1 1/8" track cog (NEW)
-Suntour Cyclone brakes w/Gran Compe levers
-LaPrade fluted seatpost
-Cinelli 1A clone stem (Technomic)
-Tange Levin sealed bearing headset
-Specialized Toupe saddle (many other choices)
-SR Campy clone pedals (other choices available) 

Here's one of the more unique single speeds you're likely to see in Salt Lake City. It is quite colorful, and a bit of a frankenbike. When I stripped all the original Suntour Superbe Pro parts off of this frame, something told me it had to be different. So I added multi-colored tires and cable housings, some 1970's real suede leather forest green bar tape (Theres only one other bike in SLC with this tape, and it's a Centurion Semi-Pro I'm selling soon), an interesting mix of black and silver parts, and jockey wheels over the shifter braze on's. The bar tape EXACTLY matches the green colored stripe in the "performance" logo on the seat tube and headtube. The jet black components contrast themselves artfully against the deeply colored frame and bar tape. This is a sharp looking bike!

I hate bare shifter braze-on's, and realized I have NEVER seen a bike with derailleur jockey wheels installed on them. It makes for a bike that's unique from everything out there, and a great conversation starter. Tell them they're rotational shifters for your super slick invisible derailleurs! And yes, they spin! If you don't like them, they can be removed in about 15 seconds.

This bike could easily be converted to a fixed gear. All you would need is a flip flop or track wheel. Bolt it in, and you have a fixie!

The large/56cm (c-c)frame will fit someone roughly 5ft 9 to 6ft 2. Both the top tube and seat tube are 56cm c-c.

The frame is a 1984 "Performance Superbe". It is made of Tange #1 steel, which is a high end tubing equivalent to Reynolds 531 (the gold standard of quality steel bikes). Suntour Superbe Pro dropouts. This bike was originally built up with Suntour Superbe Pro components, which were the best parts made in the 80's. I do have that group for sale if anyone is interested.

I just stripped the bike to the frame and thoroughly cleaned and inspected it. It was rebuilt with a brand new 1 1/8" singlespeed drivetrain (new chainring, cog, and chain). The gearing is 16x39, which gives an effective 65.8 gear inches. This is a great gearing for Salt Lake. Easy to spin up to speed, high enough to climb hills, low enough not to spin out on every hill.

Excellent mechanical condition. Powerful brakes, perfect chainline.

Very good cosmetic condition. The paint overall looks good, but has a few worn spots.